446 lines
23 KiB
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446 lines
23 KiB
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<title>The Homestuck Epilogues: Meat - Chapter 19</title>
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<div id='s19'></div>
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<div>
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<h1>Chapter 19</h1>
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<div class="o-story_text o_epilogue type-rg type-sm line-caption line-copy pad-x-0 pad-x-lg pad-b-lg">
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<p class="no-indent dirk"><span class="opener type-hs-opener-rg type-hs-opener-sm">A</span>nyway,
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back to the B Plot.</p>
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<p class="dirk">Right about now, Jade should be wrapping up her
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political presentation to Roxy and Calliope, using a lot more
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graphs and far fewer words than Dave did when roping her into the
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election. Her approach is definitely more heady, but it’s also more
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accessible. Jade’s got this disarming combo of head-in-the-clouds
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flightiness and the kind of legit, down-to-earth cred that can only
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be earned by having done something like cutting open your own
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grandfather and stuffing him full of polyurethane foam.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: so you see janes neoliberal austerity
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measures—</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy groans upon hearing the phrase
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“neoliberal austerity measures” for no less than the third time in
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this presentation.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: as i outlined here in graph b-2</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: and here in figure a-6</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: and here!!! in this very spooky drawing i
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dictated to callie</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: (great drawing by the way!!!)</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: ^u^</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: —will no doubt lead to a whole bunch of ugly
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societal backlashes</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: not just in economic terms but on a number of
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other more serious vertices that weve been lucky enough to avoid on
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new earth so far</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: u dont say</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: i DO say!!!</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: the thing is that jane is an establishment
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leader</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: shes looking at doing things the way our old
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universes did them</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: shes pretty convinced that shes going to be
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able to replicate the capitalist hierarchies that earth had but in
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a more “responsible” way</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: but none of that stuff actually
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worked!!!!!</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: and u think karkat can do better?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: i think its worth it to give him a chance</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: hes a leader of the people AND hes
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experienced firsthand what happens when establishment goes too
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far</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: which i imagine you can sympathize with!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Jade takes a deep breath, panting a
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little. Her graphs are floating around the living room in disarray.
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She spins them around her, gliding her hands through the air like a
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conductor, before folding the pages together and shrinking them to
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pocket size.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: and!!</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: that’s my pitch!!!!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy and Calliope exchange a look.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i’m...</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: going to get Us tea and snacks. woUld
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yoU like some, jade?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: oh</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: yeah sure</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: any preferences?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: ummm pumpkin matcha if you have it</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: of coUrse. i’ll be right back.</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Calliope excuses herself from the
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conversation, and flees to the kitchen, seemingly making no attempt
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to disguise the fact that she is in fact fleeing. Jade deflates as
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she watches her go, sensing that her presentation wasn’t the slam
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dunk she was hoping for.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: soooo..........</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: what do you think?</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: hmmmm</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: well i gotta say</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: this has been a hella convincing argument all
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in all</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: buuuuut idk if i can help u out</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: what????</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: why not?!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy presses her lips together, then
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bounces her palms on her knees. Her gaze slides east, right out the
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window. She and Calliope live in a belfry above New Prospit. One
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end of their living room is an oriel window that looks out over a
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public park. The other disappears into an arcading hallway lit at
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the far end by a giant stained glass window that Calliope made
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herself. The corbels supporting it have windy, abstract shapes
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carved into them. This room reminds Jade of her childhood home,
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except that it’s bright and warm and not inhabited in all corners
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by corpses and ghosts.</p>
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<p class="dirk">That’s why she can’t settle down. That’s what keeps
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Jade Harley flitting from couch to couch, relationship to
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relationship. She can’t stop thinking to herself that “home” comes
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awfully close to rhyming with “alone.”</p>
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<p class="dirk">Home is John, who doesn’t call anymore. Home is
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when Rose and Kanaya welcome her in from a cold night and help her
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set lyrics to her sick basslines. Home is here, snorting at Roxy’s
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irreverent method of storytelling and admiring Callie’s art. Home
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is Dave and Karkat. <em>Especially</em> Dave and Karkat. Jade knows
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that this election is important for a number of reasons, but let’s
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not mistake her enthusiasm for some kind of humanistic altruism.
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Girl’s got personal reasons for doing all this.</p>
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<p class="dirk">Jade drifts down to sit cross-legged on the couch
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beside Roxy. She stares at her with a doggish expression—eyes wide,
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head lolling to the side—until she gets an answer.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: i just dont rly</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: care about politics that much i guess</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy turns to face Jade again, smiling
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apologetically.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: also this election is all kinds of
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personal</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: i mean if i came into ur house and asked u to
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make some grand political w/e against your bff</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: would you be all</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: oh yea totes sign me tf up</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: im alls ABOUT the sowing of discord among my
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childhood friends</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: siiiigh let me guess</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: dirk got to you first</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: not even</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: i got no problem tellin dirk where to stick
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it lmao</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: but dirks not the one running</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: you think hes NOT the one pulling the strings
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behind the scenes?</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: sure but give janey a lil credit</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: shes got more moxie and ambition in her pinky
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than the rest of us got all together</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: shes been planning this for years</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: but shes yknow</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: ruthless? :B</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy frowns. Jade is being pretty
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unfair.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: *fragile*</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: shes gotta be miss perfect all the time for
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the billboards n press meetings</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: always wearin those power suits trying to
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look like a big bad bitch</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: you mean like....... the condesce?</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: wow ouch</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: im not just imagining it though, right???</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: you see it too</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: not to dredge up something horrible from your
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history</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: but her whole image is just kinda......
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*woof*</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: is that what you guys think?</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: u and dave and karkat?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: well...</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: yeah</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy leans forward and stares Jade down,
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like she’s searching for something behind Jade’s eyes. Jade
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unwittingly responds in kind, looking for meaning behind Roxy’s
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gaze. But she comes up empty. And to be honest, so do I.</p>
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<p class="dirk">In the spirit of full disclosure, Roxy’s the only
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one left I haven’t been able to crack. Her mind remains a total
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enigma to me, just like it always has. If I had to guess, it’s her
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Void powers that make her invisible, even to increasingly
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omniscient parties such as myself. For all intents and purposes,
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it’s like her thoughts don’t exist. She’s the same person, as far
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as I can tell. She still wears her heart on her sleeve. But the
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bottom line remains: Roxy Lalonde is still utterly fucking
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inscrutable.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: well janes not perfect</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy shrugs and runs a hand through her
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hair, which has been recently cut shorter than usual.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: and idk if shell be a good president</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: but shes not betty crocker</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: and i luv her and i dont wanna hurt her
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feelings</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: and thats p much all there is to say on the
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matter</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Calliope returns from the kitchen with
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three cups, a handmade teapot, and some candied cakes. Jade finally
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relents.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: fiiiiine</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: i understand</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: callie what about you?</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Calliope sets down the snacks, and
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brushes Jade’s skirt aside so she can sit down. She puts a claw to
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her mouth and makes a facial expression more complicated than you’d
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think a skull would be capable of.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: oh, i’d rather stay Uninvolved, thank
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yoU.</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: :(</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i feel like interfering in both
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politics and a personal argUment between my friends woUld be
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impolite as well as kind of... stressfUl, to be honest.</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: yeah</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: sorry callie i probably shouldnt have put all
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that on you</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: less apologizing, more snacking!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Calliope claps her hands together. It’s a
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bright noise. Her tone of voice is bright too. All these years and
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she still can’t believe that she has so many friends. She smiles at
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Jade, and Jade smiles back. The tea tastes great. The cakes are
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even better. Callie’s an artist in everything she does.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: wow callie youre such an amazing hostess!</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: hehehe roxy youre so lucky to have her</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy giggles. Awkwardly. She gives Jade a
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gentle jostle, an elbow to the ribs, and lowers her voice.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: psst not “her,” “them”</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: oh</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Jade tenses up, and pales. Turns a
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wide-eyed look to Calliope, who is still smiling politely. She
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realizes, a bit too late, the profoundly insensitive nature of her
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||
social misstep.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: oh!!!!!!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">She grabs one of Calliope’s hands.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="jade">JADE: oh wow!</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: im sorry i didnt mean to be uh... culturally
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||
insensitive?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: have i just been stupidly calling you a girl
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for years like a big fat dummy??</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: oh nooooo! im such an asshole!!!!!</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: yoU are absolUtely not an
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asshole!</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i didn’t mind being called a girl. i
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still don’t really mind, it’s jUst not exactly... accUrate.</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: bUt i did take comfort in “being a
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girl” for a very long time. this is something i’ve only recently
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||
decided.</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: yea...!</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy pauses, even though the lilt of her
|
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voice makes the sentence sound unfinished. She stutters the next
|
||
part out.</p>
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||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: m-me too actually</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: you??</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: o yeah we are both a “they” household now</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: package deal thing</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: things r nonbinary as fuck around here</p>
|
||
</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Wait.</p>
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||
<p class="dirk">What?</p>
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||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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||
<p class="jade">JADE: really?</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: yup</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: well</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i mean thats probably a dumb and bad way to
|
||
say it dont tell anyone i said it that way rofl</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: but yeah thats about whats goin on</p>
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||
</div>
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||
<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy? Seriously?</p>
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||
<p class="dirk">Like I said, fucking <em>inscrutable</em>.</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">I never would have guessed. Not that I’ve spent
|
||
much time contemplating issues related to gender. I’m pretty secure
|
||
in my expression of masculinity, and...</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">You know what? Fuck this. I don’t owe anyone an
|
||
explanation of any sort on this topic. I’m confident with who I am,
|
||
what I am, my gender, as well as my understanding of the concept.
|
||
You want my honest opinion? It’s fucking fantastic. Good for them.
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||
Both of them, I mean, but also, both of them in a singular fashion,
|
||
since each one can now individually be referred to by the
|
||
conventionally plural word “them.” I’m ecstatic for this personal
|
||
development they’ve embraced, for the people they are, the lack of
|
||
gender they identify with, and the pronouns they prefer. I’ve got
|
||
no problem with it whatsoever, and frankly, it’s <em>fucking
|
||
insulting</em> anyone would ever imagine otherwise.</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">So yeah, I’m gonna allow it.</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">Carry on.</p>
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||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: wow that felt good to say aloud man</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: ahah hahaha hell of a way to come out</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: its ok</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: i dont wanna make you uncomfortable</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i know</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: but i am curious!</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: if you need to talk about it i mean</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: maybe</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: callie and i have been talkin about it a
|
||
lot</p>
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||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: unpackin all kinda baggage w/ their alien
|
||
stuff and my human stuff</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: and so i got to thinking</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: what even is gender</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: amirite lol?</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: oh yeah</p>
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||
<p class="jade">JADE: that makes sense i guess........</p>
|
||
</div>
|
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Jade looks at where her hands are folded
|
||
in her lap. Bites her lip. She has her own concerns about this, her
|
||
own thoughts. Reasonable thoughts, I’d say. But I’ll refrain from
|
||
any further comment. I’m staying away from this subject, from now
|
||
on.</p>
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||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: so youre uh</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: not...... “doing gender” anymore??</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: ya i guess not lmfao</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i mean that was all stuff from our old
|
||
universe</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: whyd we even bring it here right?</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: right</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">Calliope takes a teacake between two of
|
||
her claws and eats it delicately, hyper-aware of the horrible
|
||
gnashing and snapping her powerful jaw is capable of.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: my ideas aboUt gend—</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">SHIT. Between two of <em>their</em>
|
||
claws. They take a teacake between two of their claws and eats it
|
||
delicately. Sorry, my bad.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: —er were entirely inflUenced by my
|
||
time watching earth.</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i sUppose i only thoUght of myself as
|
||
a girl because my, Um...</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: my brother took mascUlinity qUite
|
||
serioUsly.</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: by which i mean, he became very
|
||
enthUsiastic aboUt all the things it sUpposedly meant to be a
|
||
boy.</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: cherUb existence is dichotomoUs, bUt
|
||
not in the same way hUman biology is.</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i sUppose oUr view of hUman cUlture
|
||
indirectly inflUenced alternia’s development, which in tUrn
|
||
affected yoUrs, which is something i’ve had a lot of time to think
|
||
aboUt since we came here.</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: it’s all so very circUitoUs and
|
||
arbitrary.</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: yeah exactly!</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: like when u think about it...</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: so much of what earth c thinks what boys and
|
||
girls “SHOULD” do comes straight from the imagination of a bunch of
|
||
dumb teens</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: which is totally FUCKED</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: sure</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">Jade nods quite thoughtfully. She’d be a
|
||
doggy’s fucking uncle if she wasn’t gonna come across woke as hell
|
||
about all this. Truthfully though, it <em>was</em> making sense to
|
||
her. Eye-opening, really. Why hadn’t anyone told her this was even
|
||
an option when she was younger? She probably would have loved being
|
||
a “they” when she was a teen.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i mean what am i gonna do</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: get married and pop out 100 bbs?</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: uh... no???</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: exactly</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i mean once upon a time i guess i thought
|
||
about that</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: but i dont think its what i really wanted</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i just liked the idea of me and dirk makin
|
||
some smart ass awesome kids together</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: cuz i liked the idea of dirk</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: and also literally no one else on the entire
|
||
planet was alive at the time</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: but we had some babies without even bein
|
||
consulted about it anyway so w/e</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: your kids ARE pretty cool</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: i KNOW right?</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: personally im a big fan!</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">And like that, Jade’s smiling again. The
|
||
storm clouds pass so quickly in her world, you almost wouldn’t have
|
||
thought there was anything wrong at all. Roxy and Calliope
|
||
certainly didn’t notice.</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">But there is something wrong. And this time,
|
||
they’ll notice.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: i...</p>
|
||
<p class="jade">JADE: i.........</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">Jade drops her tea. The cup hits the
|
||
floor and shatters.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: jade?</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">She takes in a sharp breath. She’s not
|
||
feeling well suddenly. She’s dizzy, feverish, seeing things beyond
|
||
her field of vision. A blinding flash of light. A black, perfect
|
||
circle, burning a hole in her eyes. She tries to stand, but her
|
||
knees wobble and knock together. Roxy shoots out of her seat and
|
||
catches her before she hits the floor.</p>
|
||
<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: o shit</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: is she okay?</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: idk</p>
|
||
<p class="roxy">ROXY: get a cloth from the kitchen! and some
|
||
water!</p>
|
||
<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: okay! i’ll be right back!</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p class="no-indent dirk">Roxy eases Jade onto the couch and checks
|
||
her pulse. She doesn’t look bad at all— Jade wears unconsciousness
|
||
well, having spent the better part of her life napping. Roxy slaps
|
||
her cheeks lightly and says her name. Begs her to wake up.</p>
|
||
<p class="dirk">But she can’t hear her. Jade is somewhere else
|
||
right now.</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
</div>
|
||
</body>
|
||
</html> |