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218 lines
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<title>The Homestuck Epilogues: Meat - Chapter 27</title>
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<div id='s27'></div>
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<div>
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<h1>Chapter 27</h1>
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<div class="o-story_text o_epilogue type-rg type-sm line-caption line-copy pad-x-0 pad-x-lg pad-b-lg">
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead"><span class="opener type-hs-opener-rg type-hs-opener-sm">A</span>nd then,
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she opens her eyes.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">not the jade who just returned to me. the
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jade living on earth c, sleeping on a couch.</p>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">So, this is what we’re doing now?</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">she snaps awake. her human hands
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are clammy. her face, expressive due to the layers of flesh
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enveloping her skull, appears haunted to her friends.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: omg!</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: jade</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: jade u ok?</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: callie hurry shes wakin up</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: j... john? rose??</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: is dave...?</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: wh...</p>
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<p class="jade">JADE: what happened to.....</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: yo its ok</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: daves cool</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: rose is cool</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: everyones just straight chillin like
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usual</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">I see how it is. You don’t even intend to
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acknowledge me. Real fucking mature. If you’re going to force the
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issue of this little metanarrative tug-of-war between us, the least
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you could do is establish a clear adversarial dichotomy between our
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opposing goals.</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">jade stares straight ahead,
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feeling the weight of roxy’s arms around her shoulders. she derives
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no warmth from the interaction. her mind is being flooded by the
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memories of her deceased splinter-self. the chaos of battle, the
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excruciating impalement, the feeling of floating alone through the
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void. a chill spreads through her body. she will never be the same
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again.</p>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Actually, you know what? I think that
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Jade’s doing just fine. She’s wobbly when she gets up off the
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couch, sure, a little metaphysically stunned, but pretty used to
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the sensation of having a doomed self fold into the extra space in
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her gray matter. You know, considering it’s already happened
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before. Remember Jadesprite? People always forget about Jadesprite.
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So maybe we could stand to dial down the melodrama, just a bit?</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">when jade turns to look at roxy,
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her eyes are completely black.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: woah</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: what the actual f...</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: are you</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: are you IN there jade???</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">jade does not answer. the dead
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cherub scans her surroundings, expression neutral.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">for the sake of clarity, the dead cherub
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is a phrase i am using in reference to myself. presently, i inhabit
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jade’s body, and through her i may influence this world. i am
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enabled to convey events which take place here, and therefore
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confine the procession of causality to exist within a secure
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textual framework. my presence shall mitigate, if not altogether
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subdue, the corrosive effect on reality and the will of its
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occupants by those who would manipulate the way events are
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telegraphed for their own megalomaniacal objectives.</p>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">OK, now you’re just being
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passive-aggressive.</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">despite his pretensions to a
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greater design, the prince of heart cannot be allowed to continue
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to exert unchecked control over the authoritative recitation of
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events on this side of my horizon. it cannot be overstated the
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extent to which he represents a threat to the continued existence
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of both this world and corporeal life itself.</p>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Damn. You better watch it with those hot
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takes. You might mildly scald someone with observations this
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fresh.</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">the prince uselessly squirms and
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wails in protest at his imminent narrative impotence. however,
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there is nothing he can do as long as jade remains in this
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trance.</p>
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<p class="no-indent dirk">Nah, I’m being chill as a cucumber about this, considering
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you’re vagueblogging the shit out of my methodological approach to
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storytelling right where I can see it. Which is to say, directly
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into my fucking brain, apparently?</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">calliope emerges from the
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kitchen, carrying a bowl of cool water and a cloth. jade turns her
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head to meet the sound of their footsteps.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i came back as fast as i coU—</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">the bowl of water clatters to
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the floor. calliope does not have human flesh, and thus cannot go
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pale. what drains from them is not color, but the comforting
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certainty of their very existence. they can sense the presence of
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their other self in jade’s body. their timeline, fruitful, full of
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life and friends, sparks against mine, desolate, endless, spartan
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with righteousness and resolve. our divergent arcs collide in the
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primacy of their subconscious, bringing to the forefront of their
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mind the bleak fate they avoided by narrative fiat alone.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">calliope’s distress is obvious. roxy
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slides off the couch to approach them. but calliope stumbles
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backward in terror and trips in their desperation to escape. roxy
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gapes at them.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: hey callie</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: whats going on?</p>
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<p class="calliope">CALLIOPE: i...</p>
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: calliope its ok just talk to me</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">calliope does not talk to them.
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roxy looks to calliope, then to jade, sensing that there is dark
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energy coursing between them.</p>
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<div class="chat type-rg type-hs-small">
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<p class="roxy">ROXY: would one of you just effing say something
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already?</p>
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</div>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">finally, calliope lets out a
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shriek and flees the apartment. roxy appears as if they intend to
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run after them, but finds themself drawn back to jade. they return
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to the couch as an unnerved look begins to disturb their
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features.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">jade says nothing. she gives no indication
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that i inhabit her body, aside from the unusual appearance of her
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eyes. anchoring myself here, in this host, is enough to serve my
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purpose. there is no need to operate this body beyond keeping it in
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reserve as a silent yet alert vessel for my cognizance. there are
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other priorities i must attend to, cosmologically. the work is very
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important. the prince must be kept at bay.</p>
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<p>“The work?” Getting some pretty self-important vibes here. Like
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maybe somebody needs to get over herself? I was just having a
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little fun. Ever fucking hear of that, dead skull girl? Didn’t
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think so. This all feels really heavy-handed suddenly. Like you’re
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making a federal fucking issue out of what should be some light,
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entertaining stuff. Just a bunch of loser adults, trying to be the
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people they grew up to be, in the best ways they know how. But no,
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I guess you know best. Being an impossibly ancient alien recluse
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with virtually no exposure to human culture, emotion, or values.
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Yeah, go ahead, just take over. Sounds fine.</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">the prince finds that his hold
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on the narrative is slipping through his hands. there is an old
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myth in earth culture about katanas, that if you keep the blade
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whetted to a mirror sheen, it can cut a silk scarf falling through
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the air cleanly in two. his hold over our perceptions shall be
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severed just as elegantly.</p>
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<p>Yo, I get that you’re attempting to spin a metaphor both
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relevant and specific to my self-made symbology here, and I
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appreciate the effort. I really do. But I just cannot stand by and
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let you shamelessly spread such irresponsible misinformation on a
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subject so near and dear to my heart.</p>
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<p>The katana is a cutting weapon. Inert, it’s harmless.
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Deceptively so, you might even say. Most dangerous things appear
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banal when inert, that’s just basic physics. It’s actually the
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motion of the katana that makes—</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">roxy sets the cool cloth on
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jade’s forehead, and frowns. they are worried and confused, but
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determined to care for their friend.</p>
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<p>Hey, I’m in the middle of turning your apocryphal metaphor into
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something with substantive, allegorical weight here. I’d appreciate
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it if you would—</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">in his haste to manipulate the
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events surrounding doomed jade’s ascent toward an outcome favorable
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to himself, the prince has unwittingly revealed several glaring
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weaknesses. by dictating the reality of others through expressions
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which he and he alone can relate to, he resorts to comparing all
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experience to his own. presuming his status on this side of my
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horizon would forever go unchallenged, his hubris went unchecked.
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he exposed too much of himself to all who could observe his wanton
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display of self-gratification. many of his personal biases and
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experiences have leaked through the seams of textual causality,
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leaving them vulnerable to exploitation by an adversary.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">experiences such as the sensation of
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presiding over a vast, empty ocean. his ocean, which terminates
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with his horizon. it is a barrier, not real, but psychological,
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symbolic. no matter how much power he achieves as a man, he knows
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there are horizons he perceived as a boy which he may never cross.
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and yet i have crossed mine, with the express purpose of
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perpetually and eternally reminding him of his limits, and of
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enforcing them. limits, which like his vast, empty ocean, serve to
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remind him that he is phenomenologically, if not literally, alone.
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that he has experienced loneliness intimately and absolutely, just
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like i have. but unlike me, he is terrified by it. and i, unlike
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him, understand all too well that the children left alone are those
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who most despair at being ignored.</p>
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<p>Fuck you. I fucking hate you. You’re fucking boring, your
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narrative voice is a total fucking drag, and someday I’m going to
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make you pay for this.</p>
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<p class="no-indent calliope-dead">there. can you hear it? of
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course you can’t.</p>
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<p class="calliope-dead">but if even you could, it would sound like
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nothing at all.</p>
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